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It Is So Hard To Be The Family and Caregiver To A Cancer Patient!

10/20/2014

8 Comments

 
This became up close and personal when this myeloma patient became a caregiver to his wife who was diagnosed with breast cancer.  My wife Anita had always thought I was so strong as I went through 2 stem cell transplants and 8 bouts of high dose chemo (the hair loss kind), and 3 cases of pneumonia, and one case of sepsis.  However, I found I melted into uncontrollable tears when I felt helpless with little to no ability to make her better.  When it is someone you love it is much like a chunk of your heart is being ripped from your chest.  When you are around them you try to hold it together so you can be strong for them, but when you get by yourself is when the emotions run wild.  Thank God for the support and comfort the caregiver provides while under such mental and emotional stress. 

I recently found a similar situation when my pet dog Sadie was just diagnosed with Lymphoma.  It is amazing how your pets become part of the family, and not "Just a Dog"'  For some who have followed me and my blog over the years Sadie also starred in Myeloma Man's Christmas special as Sadie the Brown Nosed Rain Dog. 
She has not eaten for 6 days, can not hold down any food and has diarrhea, and is a very sick girl, Anita and I shed a lot of tears as we and the doctors just try to stabilize her.  I have done my research on line and found dogs can get chemo, but in dogs it only provides a life expectancy of one year.  If we go to a canine oncologist their CHOP protocol would be very expensive.  But before anything her condition must be stabilized first.    She is one month shy of 12, and they say that her life expectancy averages 11 years or between 10 and 12 years.  So some might say we should just let her go, but that is just so hard to do with a dog you love and is your best buddy.  

It is during this most recent event where my wife said that she and my daughters would have a group breakdown when they were outside the ER and I was on continuous dialysis with myeloma and end stage renal failure.  But when they came into the room they would have gained their composure and be my strength.  You just has to love and thank God for the FAMILY and CAREGIVERS of Cancer Patients.

Good luck and may God Bless your Cancer Journey.   For more information on multiple myeloma survival rates and treatments CLICK HERE and you can follow me on twitter at: https://twitter.com/grpetersen1

8 Comments
Beverly Salisbury link
10/20/2014 01:04:45 am

I'm so sorry, Anita and Gary. Sadie knows that she's been well loved. Our first dog, golden retriever (Ruby) died of cancer at 12. Our 14 yr. old golden, Socks, is doing well. Love you guys.

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Gary Petersen link
10/20/2014 01:14:44 am

Thanks Bev, Sadie is my bud, and was the one who kept smelling my stomach and knew I was sick, even before the doctors found out I had kidney failure.

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Gail Beaty
10/20/2014 04:07:04 am

Wish I could be there to give you all a big hug. That includes both dogs. Love you all. Praying for you guys.

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Debby Lamb
10/20/2014 04:13:09 am

I remember when our dogs were our kids too and lost 2 with breast cancer...it's hard. I also remember how hard it was not to cry when I flew to Florida to stay with you so Anita could go back to work so she wouldn't lose her insurance. I tried my best but ended up almost starving you to death because you couldn't have much salt during your dialysis. We can laugh at that now but at the time we were all so scared for you that we didn't know what to do. Love you guys and give Sadie Sue a hug & kiss for me!

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Gary Petersen link
10/20/2014 04:22:27 am

Bev, Gail, and Debby, you are part of Sadie's family, so we know you know how we feel. Just talked to the doctor and she says Sadie is not responding to therapy, so we will have to make the hard choice tomorrow morning. We will go say goodby tomorrow morning if she does not respond by then, She is my Sadie Sue, and I just can not let her go, but she is just so weak and tired.. It hurts!

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Gail
10/21/2014 12:22:30 am

So sorry. We all love your doggies so much. Yes, it was such a hard decision to let Lucy go. She was my best bud too. I will never forget that day. It still makes me cry. My heart goes out to you guys. We love you guys so much.

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Olivia
10/21/2014 03:45:02 am

Sooo sorry Gary and Anita give her a hug and kiss for me!! I will miss Sadie sue! She was such a sweetie! You and Anita have given her a great life!

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Gary Petersen link
10/21/2014 11:05:43 pm

Thanks to all who commented and especially to her extended family, which she loved to see when you visited. Unfortunately my little girl Sadie Sue did not make it. Diagnosed too late and nothing the vet could do to stabilize her. The care from Ponti Vedra Animal Hospital was great and called us in just in time to give her some love, petting and say our last goodbys.

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    Gary R. Petersen
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    CLICK HERE for my myeloma journey

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